


Starlight

by Kurohitenshi



Category: Voltron - Fandom, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Adam & Keith Friendship, Adam knows and understands, Angst, M/M, One-sided pining, SHEITH - Freeform, Shiro & Keith Friendship, adam pov, mature relationships, pre-kerberos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 07:59:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16530584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kurohitenshi/pseuds/Kurohitenshi
Summary: Pre-Kerberos: Adam knows. He sees things. To him, an adult relationship can come and go and he knows he can move on. But even he’s not blind enough to not see that to Keith, Takashi was /everything/. And although relationships can be complicated sometimes, other times, it really is quite simple. Life does move on.





	Starlight

There used to be a time when just the sight of Keith was a source of illogical irritation to Adam. Weeks ago, watching from faraway with the rest of the crowd, he could see, at the base of the shuttle next to the Holts, Keith – and /him/.

Takashi.

It was the day of the launch and it was a few hours from the commencement of the mission. He knew he shouldn’t be there to watch, but a shared history and whispered promises of forever was a difficult thing to quit. 

They’ve known each other since the start of their Garrison schooling. A year later, they began dating, and from dating, it wasn’t long before they got engaged as graduation neared. It was easy, comfortable. He knew all of Takashi’s quirks and in turn, Takashi was always gracious and loving. Some of their friends teased that they were like an old married couple. Fought like one too.

And there were a lot of fights.

Not all the time, but when they fought, sometimes, it turned ugly. They brought out a side of each other that was almost cruel beyond words.

One of the reasons had been Keith.

Again, it was a highly illogical reason to fight about the boy, but as they say, love is a battlefield. Adam always felt guilty afterwards, even if it drove Takashi out even more, with long stints out at the desert, long after base curfew, as if he was chasing wildly after the faintest glow of starlight.

To Adam, Keith was nothing more than a child. But it drove him up the wall how dedicated Takashi was to him, and in turn, how Keith looked at Takashi like he hung the moon. It was very understandable of course. The boy had so much potential but kept getting into trouble. He was an orphan. He had no home. He had nothing – except Takashi. To Keith, Takashi was everything.

Adam hated that he couldn’t find it in himself to accept Keith as family, just like Takashi had.

It wasn’t like he didn’t try though. With Takashi’s request, they invited Keith out for outings when the rest of the Garrison students were allowed days off with their families. They went to arcades, mini golf, cinema, and even a weekend at a lake house. During those times, Adam had been much more welcoming. They both treated Keith like a little brother – teased him when girls or boys paid him attention, doted on him with little gifts, and made sure they were making up for his nearly absent childhood. Keith blushed a lot, and wasn’t used to kindness and it was sweet. But Adam knew, even then, that Keith’s whole world was simply just Takashi. His soft gaze, his sweet little smiles, and his longing looks when he thought no one was looking – it was cute but Adam hoped it was nothing more than puppy love from the young boy.

The fights came later, as Takashi became much more engrossed with preparation for the Kerberos mission. Adam didn’t want him to go, even though he knew it meant the world to Takashi. It was illogical but Adam couldn’t help himself. He wanted Takashi to stop making risks. It wouldn’t do them good in the long run – and they were a unit, despite not being married yet. Two people who are in a lifetime commitment ought to be able to talk about these things and make decisions together. In the end, it was probably best that they called off the wedding. Spending time apart and getting to know themselves during that time, it seemed much more glaring how much they were incompatible. They loved each other but it had been a partnership of convenience. They’ve never really made each other crazy, even when they were younger. It was a peck on the cheek in the morning before school or work, making love in their room with a locked door, while their friends regaled them with wild stories of breaking into jets and fucking until dawn. Adam had always wondered at the bright eyes that shone on Takashi’s face when he listened to those types of stories with rapt attention.

It almost made him wonder if Takashi and Keith, in the desert, way past curfew – but Adam knew it was illogical and it made him more mad at himself in the end for even thinking it. Takashi may have a streak of wildness, same as Keith, but he was not like that. Not at Keith’s age.

Months before the launch, Adam arranged a sit-down talk with Takashi – a proper grown up talk about the practicalities of their failed engagement. Mutual belongings were going to be sold or given away and other logistics dilemmas were talked about and solved. Then came the matter of Keith.

Adam couldn’t say he was surprised, really, but at that point in time, he wasn’t really that bothered anymore.

“You will check on him from time to time, won’t you?” Takashi asked him, eyes full of concern. “With me being gone, he won’t have anyone else. I know you didn’t like him all that much, but to me, he’s family.”

Adam tried not to roll his eyes, but he did understand. “I’ll keep an eye out for your little troublemaker. He’s changed a lot since you met him though, so I’m sure he’ll be alright.”

Takashi’s smile was warm. “Thank you, Adam.” He stood all of a sudden, and stuck his hand out cordially. “And I guess… this is good bye.”

Adam rose more slowly, heart skipping a beat for just a second as he looked up at Takashi’s handsome face. He smiled and nodded, and inside of himself, he felt himself settle down, and accept that they were never meant to be, and it was okay to move on. “Good luck and good bye, Takashi.”

They parted, that day, as friends.

*** 

It was a few weeks after the launch when he saw Keith again. Adam had been at a café just outside base with his officer friends, getting updated with the latest news and gossip. He almost didn’t see the boy as he parked his hover bike across the street and went to the nearest vending machine to buy water.

Adam excused himself and went to him.

Keith looked up at him with a dusty face, pink cheeks, and windswept hair. It was nostalgic, as Keith usually only looked like that when he was with Takashi. Keith smiled hesitantly. “Hi Adam.”

Adam ruffled his hair familiarly. “Keeping out of trouble?”

Keith shrugged. “I haven’t been called to Iverson’s office for months.”

“Your grades?”

“Good enough, I suppose.”

“That’s good.” Adam said, curiously. “Is there anything you need? You know even if Takashi and I are no longer together, I’m still a friend, okay?”

Keith scratched the back of his neck self-consciously but nodded his head. “I’m fine, Adam. Thanks for offering though.”

“Good boy.” Adam said warmly. “We should catch up sometime. I’ll text you next Friday afternoon if you’re available. Okay?”

“Okay.” Keith said, nodding and forcing a small smile. “Thank you.”

Adam let him go with another ruffle to his hair, marvelling at how much he had grown since he and Takashi had first known him and yet, how tiny he still was.

*** 

Every few weeks, Adam and Keith would go to a café for an hour or so and just catch up. It was as if he was taking Takashi’s place as Keith’s mentor, but it wasn’t truly the same. They weren’t as close, or at least it was more difficult to bridge that gap although they both tried. Instead, they spoke about school, about studying and flying techniques. They were slowly on their way to being friends.

That is, until he felt familiar arms wrapping around him from behind as he was speaking to Keith, and a low rumble of laughter against his hair. It was David, a local veterinarian he’d been dating for a few weeks. Adam let the man lean down and give him a peck on the cheek, his smile brightening as he felt his face flush.

“David, what a surprise,” he said as he looked up at blue eyes and blond hair.

“Hi darling, I hope I didn’t interrupt your mentoring session,” David said before turning friendly eyes to Keith. “Keith, right? A cadet from the Garrison? Adam’s told me about you.”

When Adam looked at Keith, the boy almost looked crestfallen and alarmed, but it must’ve been a trick of the light because he looked civil as he nodded at David. “Yes, sir. Nice to meet you.”

“Did Adam tell you about me?” David asked with a friendly demeanour. When Keith shook his head, he charmingly told stories about cute pets and their antics, and even Keith smiled at some point.

Later on, as Adam was dropping Keith off at his dormitory, Keith sighed slowly before turning hesitant eyes at Adam.

“Adam,” he said. “I don’t think you should be taking me out as often as we’ve been going.” He shifted his eyes, looking away. “I’m sorry.”

A little bit surprised, Adam tried to guess the sudden change in the boy. “Is it because of David?”

Back stiffening at the implication, Keith lowered his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Keith, I understand if you’re uncomfortable and I respect whatever you decide. I suppose for you, you’ve only known me to be with Takashi. Seeing me with someone else, it must feel weird, right?”

Keith nodded slowly but said nothing.

“Relationships change, people change. I know you love Takashi very much, and he loved you very much too. To him, you’re the little brother he never had and he even entrusted you to me before he left, did you know?”

Curious and with cheeks burning, Keith hesitantly looked his way. Adam smiled at him as he laid a hand on a slim shoulder.

“When you’re an adult, things will change if your feelings are still there. You shouldn’t give up hope. Just be yourself and always express your feelings to the person you love, got it? I wish it worked out between Takashi and myself but I’ve come to terms with it. We weren’t meant to be. Adult relationships can end and you just move on. Or a boy can grow and if love is mutual, then maybe relationships like that can happen too. Love has always been there for you. It will just evolve and grow.”

Keith blinked and there were silent, unshed tears in his eyes.

Adam pulled him to his chest and wrapped his arms around him. “I understand more than you know.”

Keith said nothing but clutched on to him with a silent gasp, hiding his face on his chest.

“Thank you, Adam.”

*** 

Many months later, the Kerberos mission was pronounced over - a tragedy due to “pilot error.”

Adam and his friends were at a dinner party when they saw the news. 

Many people will always remember where they were when the news was released. Adam remembered running out of the house and driving as far as he could in the desert, stopping only when the car ran out of gas. Then he ran as far as he could, until he could run no more, shouting in anger to the heavens until his voice was hoarse. He collapsed, sand in his hair as he looked up at the stars that were so bright and vivid in the middle of the desert, knowing that Takashi’s lifeless body was somewhere out there, in between planets and stars, lost forever.

*** 

It was a day later, after David picked him up from the desert, fed him soup and helped him into a bath when he remembered one other person who felt the same or probably even worst than he did.

Takashi had been Keith’s *everything*.

Adam closed his eyes and tears spilled yet again, not just for him this time, but for a young boy who knew his pain.

***

It was nearly a week later when Adam dragged himself out of bed to look for Keith in the cadet dormitory. But when he got there, the room was empty, as if he had never been there. 

Keith had been expelled, and was lost. Some students said they saw him disappear into the desert, but no one came after him. He had vanished like dust. Just like Takashi.

He was lost in the desert, not wanting to be found, with only the stars to guide him now.


End file.
